Secrets- We All Have Them

There is a saying "whats done in the dark, will eventually come to light". I really cant stand that saying. Not all secrets are revealed. Some secrets are better left that way! Everyone will have that one secret that they will take to their grave. And it just so happens to be the darkest one of all.

  So I think I just prove that saying wrong. And for all of those who still wish to live in denial and believe that saying to be true, well good luck. To each its own. I guess. 

  But why would a person share everything about themselves. What gives you the right to want to know everything about a person?!?! Especially when you yourself do not feel comfortable giving away all your secrets. What happen to privacy of others and respecting it as such?? Everyone has dirt, there is not one person who is perfect.

So my question is " Who gets to determine whats done in the dark, will eventually come to light". No One! 

And we really shouldn't worry about someone's dark past or secrets , the only exception I have to this is , of course if it effects you personally and directly. Other than that, we would be better off to mind our own business. But thats only in a perfect world, filled with perfect people right lol.

  I still rather go with the saying " what you don't know, wont hurt you!!"

Even though I'm not good at keeping secrets, well secrets of other people. I wont share mine so willingly. Its more of a reason for people to mind their own business. My opinion anyway.

Secrets to Tell, Secrets to Keep: How to Best Handle Your Hidden Thoughts and Feelings--and Move Beyond Therapy to a Truly Joyous, Creative, and Fulfilling Life

   So what do you think? Do you think people should be more open with their secrets? Or should people just learn how to mind their own business? 

Lets Talk About Love

I was wondering can one be "in love "with more than one person at the same time? Looking back on it, I really dont think you can. In my opinion you can love more than one person at the same time, but not in love with more than one person.
I personally think its a different kind of feeling of "loving" and being "in love".


I have in the past, liked and had feelings for different guys at the same time. Confuse it with being in love (we were all young once).


But now I realized I wasn't really in love with them because I didnt fully accept them and lost interest just as quickly. But I'm also an Aries too( yea I know, yikes!!lol)

But then its like who can really say that one cant be in love with more than one person? Maybe you have, or even me. Love is so confusing (shaking my head)

You have the:

• "ideal love",
• "practical love",
• "brotherly love",
• "friendship love",
• "perfect love", 
• "passionate love", 
• "mellow love"

And I can go on and on with the different types of love. You wonder how one even came of with the definition of what love is, and how to describe it.

But because in reality people do develop feelings for more than one person, how do you condition yourself to follow society's rules regarding mono relationships?


Should people be more accepting of open relationship, or should you just learn to discipline yourself?
(I'm not saying cheating is ok because its a form of deception. And any kind of deception is wrong.)
Im talking about honesty and having open relationships where both parties know where they stand and who they're with.

But like the saying goes, you cant help who you fall for.

Scorn Before Dating

If you looked at my title and thought to yourself, "how can one be scorned before dating? Before her first relationship? Before she even has the chance to fall in love with a man who will marry her one day? Is it possible?"

Yes it's possible. I once thought like you. I didn't realize until this year how bitter i was, and somewhat am now. 

They say time heals all wounds. But I say thats Bull. 

Over time some wounds fester into big infection and others even fatal. 

So you see, time can only do so much. But how you use your time can determine whether you'll be healed or unfortunately get a fatal infection.


Back to the topic..

How can one be scorn before dating?

 Well I for one have serious daddy issues. Issues with abandonment. And I never took the time to let my issues heal. Over time I found myself bitter towards men, taking out my anger towards my father out on them.

 Thinking to myself, if my own flesh and blood broke my heart, whos to stop the next man from breaking my heart also.

So you see, until now, I've discovered you can be scorned before you have your first relationship, fall in love with a man, or even something as little as a friendship.

Every woman who has been left or betrayed by their father at an early age can relate to the same heartbreak as I. We all know that hurt will never go away. But how we choose to go about that pain is our own decisions.

Is it truly fair for hurting a man the same way my father hurt me? 

I admit, I did destroy a few potential good relationships with men who sincerely fell for me out of fear of a broken heart. Not realizing I was the true heartbreaker. 

And I know one day Karma will be back to collect as it will w/ my father.
           

What Does Love Do?

As I sit here late at night, thinking about my love life, I wonder if I made all the right choices when it comes to love. Is there any right or wrong choices when love is involved?

But then what about the responsibilities we have to our love ones. Example..I've met a man (or 2, maybe 3...anyhow) that had a family. He was already in a relationship, they both had a child/ren together, but when I asked him about their future together, its always nothing serious. 

His words " O, She is only my baby's mother" ...
My response " So are you two in a relationship? "
His words " Im in a situation and its complicated "

So in other words he kind of danced around the question I asked. He didn't confirm anything with a yes or no.

At this point my red flags go up immediately. I'm no fool, but you can't control who you end up falling for.. the old "head vs heart" is always a killer in love.

And thats where it all begins. Feelings, complicated situations, and unanswered questions. 

*sigh* You have to love "love". It makes for a wonderful drama filled story or great movie. 

People do things out of love and others don't do certain things for love. 

Love can make someone think its the best feeling in the whole world, then turn around and cause the most pain you've ever experienced by losing the one you love.

And for me, well im sitting up...another restless night of sleep because of the men I love, some return my love and well others I wish i never loved.